ooohh,its' rainbow fish!! ;x

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confessions of a drunkard

So weird huh, I've got so much to say but I want to keep all my words a secret at the same time. As I am typing this I'm currently in a drunk state.. so I dun really know what I may type out. I'm in such a stupid state now cause I just (or you can say a few hours ago) made a very stupid decision. Didn't know I was like this.. totally loser if viewed from a third party.. I can't even do things that I want to do cause I took into consideration how many parties will be affected from my actions. In the end I chose to hurt myself and indeed I hurt myself so badly because of all this. I took all the suffering and I hope it didn't affect anyone at all. This must be some retribution so I'll just swallow it. I was glad some showed concern but it just reminds me of how stupid I was whenever I pretend and lie to them that I'm okay. Those two thought I was angry but actually I'm just sad cause I was making a decision.. A really tough one. In the end I chose to hurt myself and leave you two in confusion. . Whatever man.. who asked god to create me
as someone who likes to think too much (I'd rather be stupid). Oh and I don't like it when people say I look angry when I'm actually sad.

As I was left alone with only alcohol around, it just made my whole world crumbling down. I don't know why it was so strong this time. Maybe I was always soft on the inside and I used to keep bearing with everything by pretending. I don't think anyone know what I'm talking but this blog has become some place for me to write things that will make me feel better (I hope). I don't understand why those two like to do this when I've already made it very clear before. Guess their urge to watch a nice show managed to overpower their true self. Actually its not really their fault but who can I blame except myself for having no courage to declare what I really feel? In the process of trying to make everyone else feel good.. I "accidentally" hurt myself.

This post sounds so stupid that I feel like deleting it right away but I know I've got to post it cause this is the only way I can express how I felt tonight.. the night I lost control of my emotions.

A sorrow no one can understand nor share..

The name is
Xue YuYu
Delivered to this damned world on
18th May 1991
He is male;
stands at 1.79m and weighs 78kg
No. 14
If you want to know more about him- xue_100@hotmail.com -mail him
smile =], thats what you should do
get lost if u hate me, saves time mate ;)

❥
rugby&wushu
people who respects him

✖ =\
arrogant people backstabbers gays

☻ =D
wish to win something as a HwaChong rugger
~~wish to win a medal as a HC wushuer~~ wish for straight As
wish for 1.82m height
...oh, & abt a thousand things more =)

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