ooohh,its' rainbow fish!! ;x

xue3 shang4 jia1 shuang1

All of a sudden I am back into blogging. I just sprained my ankle from basketball again. Totally incoherent.. ahh whatever. I feel damn sian cause it seems that whenever I am injured there is no one there who really cares but whenever others are injured I am always the one who brings them the treatment. I know the people I know are not with me when I am injured but its just this sudden loneliness that makes me really sad.

Looks like I have no real friends too, except the few buddies whom I hang out or study with. I haven't really found someone that I share all my thoughts with.. with the closest being SS, who sometimes can be very annoying too!!

So I sat under my block for half an hour or so thinking why is my life turning out to be like this. Was I always putting up a tough front when I should be asking help? Well this time I didn't give the people playing with me a chance to help cause I knew all they could do was to show some words of concern.. nice enough but too bad it won't help. I seem to lack trust in others and I do like to take things into my own hands. If that's the reason why I am friendless (I seriously hope not), then I'll end up friendless forever.. sad! I sound rather immature here.

This sorta reminds me of another person who once told me he had no friends too, I tried to be friends with him but I don't think I'll ever want to get closer to him cause I can't really makes friends with anyone who doesn't return my kindness. I can't really stand people who are so called "zhong se qing you".. hate to confess but I may be feeling this way cause I've never been in a serious relationship so I'd never know how zhong se I'll become.

Err back to what happened after I sprained my leg. I got back home after i iced my ankle and my mom was the first to notice my sprained leg cause I was limping but the sad part came when she asked whether I needed a plaster! Don't know whether you should call that cute or ... =.= err I shouldn't badmouth my parents. So I carried out all the healing procedures myself and that's true for all other injuries I have sustained in the past.

Isn't it quite sad if you live life this way forever?

A sorrow no one can understand nor share..

I bruised my lip yesterday playing bball and got two cuts on both of my hands. No wonder NBA people all wear mouth guard play. Well at least my front tooth didn't get knocked off. Well that isn't as dulan as what happened today. All thanks to Chester leow, who smacked my face while trying to block me. That game with him just got more violent and I started to get pissed. I think there still much to be learnt from the adults I was playing with yesterday, such as being less docile, like playing rugby like that.

Can't remember which of my friends told me that if I had a grudge over someone I should confront him personally, I am too lazy to do that cause I am not going to take a load of shit in my face against someone I don't like. Moreover you have to see who is this person in the context. First time I rant about someone on my blog, totally not my style.

Oh and guess what, I was nice enough to say bye to him after that and he merely ignore.. hate such people, if I was like 5 KG heavier than I am I don't think you'll be so arrogant infront of me. I think I'm going to follow the steps of cs, totally cool ttm. I wonder why have I become so unforgiving.. cause I'm tired of being nice.. not like I am very nice in the first place -.- Whatever lar, so stupid ranting over someone in school.

As for tests.. I screwed blocks.. so.. I'm gonna drop a few things on hand so I can mug properly and one of them is definitely gonna be basketball.

A sorrow no one can understand nor share..